Hard to know....

It's an historic day here in America.

When I went to bed last night, I noticed that someone on Facebook commented the president was about to give an address. Weird, I thought. What I should've thought was, weird, I should probably pay attention to that. But I was so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I just went to bed. I tossed and turned for several hours, and at no point did I think, let's check Facebook. Let's read CNN. Let's turn on the TV. I finally fell asleep after 11.

When my alarm went off at 5, I had a text from Mike saying simply, "Osama is dead."

For real?

That's when I hit Facebook, CNN, and the TV.

I don't know how to feel about this.

I'm glad we made this big gain in the war on terrorism. I do not mourn his passing. I'm glad for the spike that's about to happen in Obama's popularity, what with next year being an election year. I feel compassion for the families of the 9/11 victims who report having closure and feeling like justice has been done.

But at the same time...I cannot celebrate his death. I don't know that we really had a choice, but I believe killing is wrong, whether done in the name of a perverted distortion of a religious text or in the name of vengeance and justice. An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind. And furthermore - there's going to be backlash from the remains of al Qaeda. I'm frightened for the safety of Americans, at home and abroad. And I hate that bin Laden died a martyr.

What impresses me is that we could've easily defiled the body, kept it in a freezer somewhere, cremated it...all a final "fuck you" to the man that gave us a huge national black eye and nationwide PTSD. Instead, we were respectful, handling the body in the Islamic tradition. That's classy, America.

I am somewhat hopeful, too. I do hope that when the dust settles, we'll be able to bring our troops home. That the world will be a more peaceful place. That maybe, ultimately, one day, the world will be a little safer.

And one final feeling...I am, as always, proud of and indebted to the men and women who serve to keep us safe. I may not always support the war, but I always support those that fight it.

It's an amazing thing, this. We'll see how it pans out...