So, way back when dinosaurs roamed the earth and I was in medical school, someone in our class found this aptitude test online for figuring out your specialty. I was stressed out about choosing a specialty at that point and couldn't figure out what I really wanted to do and was so very hopeful that this would tell me what I was supposed to be doing with my life and then my sense of identity that was in such flux would be all set and life would be better. I remember taking it at the time, and I think it said that I should go into either preventive medicine or PM&R, I don't remember which, and then aerospace medicine, and then something else (ER?), and then I thin OB was 4th or 6th or something. So I happened to come across it on someone else's blog today, and thought, oh, isn't that fun, I should take it again and see what it thinks I should be doing now (you know, having just switched careers and all that). So this is the list that it gave me:
1. preventive med
2. pediatrics
3. pulmonology
4. nephrology
5. aerospace med
6. psychiatry
7. physical med & rehabilitation
8. med oncology
9. neurosurgery
10. rheumatology
11. hematology
12. general internal med
13. emergency med
14. dermatology
15. orthopaedic surgery
16. radiology
17. urology
18. plastic surgery
19. occupational med
20. allergy & immunology
21. radiation oncology
22. thoracic surgery
23. obstetrics/gynecology
24. nuclear med
25. ophthalmology
26. endocrinology
27. infectious disease
28. anesthesiology
29. colon & rectal surgery
30. otolaryngology
31. general surgery
32. gastroenterology
33. cardiology
34. neurology
35. family practice
36. pathology
Huh?
Okay, first off, I can't think of anything I'd be more bored doing than preventive medicine. And for the number of times it asked me if I liked problem solving and challenges and I answered "most true", you'd think this would be at the bottom of the list. Secondly, NO WAY am I built for pediatrics. Kids scare the hell out of me. Remember how 80% of my intern class wants to go into Child and Adolescent, and I'm like, no way in hell, I'm going to go do Forensic Psychiatry? Then, nephrology? Yick. I hated that rotation. Pulmonology I might buy because I did like intensive care an awful lot, and ICU med tends to be a pumonology thing. But of all the things I thought about doing - Ortho, Urology, PM&R, ER - renal was never EVER one of those things. Neither was dermatology, ew. And shit, seriously - can you see me as a plastic surgeon?
Next year I have to do pre-op evaluations for patients undergoing bariatric surgery. A, can you imagine them sitting across from my fat white ass during this process? And 2, you know I'm going to be all diagnosing everyone with eating disorders or whatever and pointing out that surgery ain't going to fix that (those of you who know me IRL know how vehemently opposed I am to bariatric surgery in general. Because seriously, everyone, everyone has complications, they tend to be bad, and there's a high mortality rate from the surgery itself, much less the consequences thereof. Plus, not healthy, and, usually doesn't fix the real problem! Getting skinny is not an automatic remedy for your low self esteem or your traumatic childhood or your whatever. But, I digress). I imagine me as a plastic surgeon would be much the same scenario. "Look, you're gorgeous the way you are. And this nip and tuck business isn't really going to help, since I can't fix your neurosis with my scalpel. So why don't we rethink this plan, and you tell me what's really going on..."
Did you notice, by the way, that OB/G was, um, #23 on the list. Ah, well. It seemed like a good idea at the time....
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6 comments:
People love dermatology - very rare to be called in the middle of the night for an emergency!
And isn't bariatric surgery good as an interim solution for people so overweight that they need a jumpstart or they'll be too fat and sickly to ever move enough to lose the weight?
Don't worry - I never had it - just wondering?
That test asks the same questions over and over. My top two results were dermatology and anesthesiology. I guess dermatology is another word for, "Good thing you aren't a doctor, because you prefer easy jobs".
You've listened to your own tastes. Much better than a test. Though, I have to admit, the results paint an interesting portrait. . .
Oh, dermatology is a nice life, for sure! It's just not my nice life. I can't tell a macule from a papule. They all just look like "rashes" to me!
No, no way, but that's a common misconception in today's sort of postmodern, fix-it-now society. It's not an "interim" solution or a "quick fix" for anything. It's a difficult, extreme surgery with a lot of bad complications and a high mortality rate. The Lap Banding surgery is a little safer but still fraught with issues. Gastric bypass is so dangerous my old hospitl in Chicago actually stopped doing it, and it was a huge cash cow (no pun intended) for them. And even the expected complications are, I think, awful and unacceptable. It's basically just forced starvation. Who would think that's a good idea if it were happening to skinny people?
I also really object to the way a lot of these "weight centers" prey on insecurity and fear and promote the already skewed and rigid ideas of what physical beauty is, its paramount importance, and role as your sole source of value.
I don't see knitting. Where the hell is the rotation in knitting? Who's going to walk me through my first sweater?
GDR.
Barb
PS: Those dermatologists who haven't been called in the middle of the night? They haven't met me.
PPS: You do know that you can't drink wine after bariatric surgery, right? I think if they told people that up front we'd see a real decline in the usage.
Great post - I could never deal with kids either (in the bizarre parallel universe in which I would be a doctor - despite my dislike of needles, blood, body parts, etc., etc.) I know what you mean about the bariatric surgery. There is a girl I used to work with who had it done, and she has had a TON of complications. She can't really eat, and I think she is actually TOO thin now and looks sick. Totally agree on it not fixing the underlying issues. Don't a lot of the patients end up getting addicted to other things afterward? They're clearly still trying to self-medicate, and will take whatever they can to do it. Sad.
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