It was a rough call night. I'm just leaving State Hospital now (not bad, but I'm doubting my ability to drag myself out of bed later to go to Starbucks and post. We'll see). So I thought I'd share a few insights from my evening about how not to get let out of a state psychiatric facility. Remember that I'm limiting the list to prime examples heard since 8pm last night.
Five things to say that will guarantee you a longer admission:
5. "I want to see my doctor. Gonna punch him out."
4. "Just wait. [Insert pretty much anyone here, but especially a mental health provider] is going to be sorry s/he messed with me."
3. "Oh. I lost count of how many pills I took because I was drunk."
2. "I'm not talking to you." (Then...who exactly are you talking to?)
And, it should go without saying...
1. "Look at my butt!"
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5 comments:
I once knew a girl who I called "Little Miss Look At My Boobs!" Perhaps she would like to meet #1.
But what if it's a really, really good butt?
Oy chickie. Don't suppose you've signed up for a self defense course anytime soon? Or do I need to send you some pepper spray asap?
My favorite, though I hate the concept overall, is the ad for the "Look Dad, Aren't You Proud" (er, I mean, Girls Gone Wild) in which an obviously drunk young woman lifts up her shirt and says "Here's my boobs!" Chef and I giggle about that frequently.
I'm not supposed to be laughing out loud, am I? I mean, being as how the line between those people and me is so very, very fine? (I feel safe in saying that I pretty much go out of my way to avoid calling attention to my butt.)
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