Hot blooded (check it and see)

(Miss the reference? First of all, shame on you. But, if so, click here.)

Technically, my temp's only 102. And, I told you it wasn't the flu.


Which is fortunate. What's unforunate is that they had to suck stuff out of my nose to find out. That was a little uncomfortable. I also don't have strep, in case you were wondering. But they sent me home from work today regardless.

I really felt like shit this morning when I went in, and then I started having shaking chills during rounds. Which is when I decided I probably shouldn't take call tomorrow night. And I was talking to my cohort and we got to discussing the fact that there've been several lab-diagnosed cases of flu on our unit. And I said, hmm, maybe I should go get a flu swab. And then if I do have the flu, I'll just do my work with a mask on tomorrow, and...my co-intern was like, dude, they're not going to let you work if you've got the flu.

So what did I say?

"Oh. Then I'd better not go get swabbed."

So what did she say?

"Don't be an idiot."

She was right, of course. So I go down to Employee Health, and ask for a flu swab. The nurse was like, hmm, yeah, we don't typically do that. I said, we've got all these patients upstairs with flu upstairs. She said, welllll, I'd have to talk to the epidemiologist. I said, okay. She sighs, says, fine, come in, we'll at least take your temperature and whatnot. And, lo and behold, it was 102.

She goes out of the room. She comes back in wearing a mask. Umm....

So they did a nasal aspirate for flu and a rapid strep test and they sent me home. And I spent a good 45 minutes fussing and working and trying to rearrange the call schedule so my call was covered and figuring out the work for tomorrow and finally my chief resident threw me out and as I turned to leave I saw him reaching for a bottle of Purell. And it cracked me up a little. Which of course sent me into a coughing fit.

Employee Health paged me about a half hour later and said, everything was negative. So if it's flu, it's not Flu A. Which means it could be Flu not-A, of course. Or just some random upper respiratory virus. But I'm banished from the hospital until I've managed to not run a fever for 24 hours. Which means I'm missing work again.

I really don't know what else I can take this month.

The final irony of it? The call switches they worked out put me on call on Roman Good Friday. Which, um, not a very big deal to me, because Orthodox Easter is like a month and a half later than Roman Easter this year. But it's a holiday. And being on call on a holiday earns me a comp day. Which is an extra day off, scheduled at my discretion.

I....really though....

So it's Thursday. Let me start with some things I don't love. Don't love the not-A Flu or whatever this is. Don't love Afrin (it really makes my throat burn and I'm not sure it's worth the decongesting). Don't love missing work AGAIN. But here are five things that I do love today:

5. Kleenex.
4. Getting comp days for being sick (okay, not that I don't have to actually work the holiday, too, but still)
3. Nurse Maggie
2. Hot liquids
1. My DVR, which I've been lying on the couch watching all afternoon. So here's today's quotable SVU.

Tutuola: What's all this?
Stabler: Asbestos testing.
Benson: It's in every building constructed before 1970.
Tutuola: I'm not stayin' in here with all those tiny cancer-causing particles flying around!
Munch: Stop worrying. As an African-American you're statistically far more likely to die of diabetes, high blood pressure, or heart disease.
Tutuola (defensively): Or a bullet!

It's possible I'm a little delirious, but that made me giggle.

Oh, and PS - tomorrow is the Blog 365 "Day of Rest", so I'm not compelled to blog tomorrow under the rules of the...um...game, arrangement, whatever it is. We'll see if I have anything to say tomorrow. I might just hide from the end of February (before something ELSE tries to follow up the pox/court/high fever trifecta....).